Dating stories – The Poker Guy (Part. 2) *This is my fave story to tell*

If you haven’t read the first part of this shitty date story which is, totally decadent, I share the link HERE. Or if you simply want to read it again..

So yeah, last time I stopped when I was in my fushia sequin dress, at the hotel, knocking on his door while he was waiting for somebody else…

BAM! He opened the door et saw me. I had so many things I wanted to say to him, the shame-on-you, the “I hope your daughter ends up with someone EXACTLY like you!” so he’d realize the damages he’s done.. well all I really did was stand there, looking at him with my disgusted look, turned around and walked back. He kept calling me (not too loud though, not to cause a scene..) but I continued to walk away.

Vodka and acting class 101

I went to the hotel bar because I was way too angry to drive back right away. The barman asked what I wanted and I replied “A vodka please. The most expensive you have!” because I knew Poker Man would be here eventually.. et here he was, kept looking at the floor, sat besides me. All he did was fix at the floor and act like a kid who got caught doing something wrong. Then he murmur I’M SORRY..

On my end, I sigh and roll my eyes.. Then he invited me up to his room so we could talk. He paid my drink (bingo! that’s where you will pay, sucka!) and we go. In the room, I sat on the 1 seat sofa and waited for him to explain. And he said the same thing over and over, looked at the floor, said he was sorry.. while I’m watching the VMA’s, giving him angry looks. His act was clearly staged and nothing was sincere. At one time, he even tried to cry and I got up and said “OK, I’ve heard enough, I’m going!”

He paid for my parking (ca$hing!) and I said “You know the plus size community is tight, dude. That the other girl you talk to in Montreal knows NOW that you are married. (They had planned a dinner that night, that she canceled after my call!) That ladies from Toronto you follow on Instagram knows now too. That the women from New York, L.A., Chicago that you added from MY contacts on Instagram, you bet they will know too!” And I left on that note.

Someone is looking for me

After about a year later, I came back from work and fell asleep. When I woke up, my phone was nonstop buzzing. Missed calls, 4-5 text messages.. What is going on? Oh… OH!!.. Poker Man is looking for me. He said “Yes, I’m in Montreal and I was wondering if you wanted to have a drink and talk..”

Well, I haven’t eat yet and I’m hungry.. Why not! Anyway, nothing will happen with him, I work tomorrow and he was fun to talk to.. OK! I’ll go.

So we met at the restaurant, ate and talked.. I asked how was his wife, and he said they are still together but are in an open couple (yeah right.. does she know though, that she is in an open couple?!) and we catch up. He paid the bill and wanted to get closer to me. Then he invited me to go up to his hotel room to see the view from up there. Why not, I KNOW I won’t let anything happen anyway..

We got there and indeed, the view was incredible! Montreal by night, with the lights and all, it was really beautiful to watch. And he starts kissing my neck, grabbing my waist and “I gotta go! I work tomorrow.. Ciao!”

Flesh is weak, my friend Isabelle would say.

The next day, he called me back. “Come watch a movie with me at the hotel.. it would be nice to cuddle..” And I thought about it. Now I knew he was married/in an open couple (pfff), so he couldn’t make me believe anything anymore. You want sex, only sex? Fine! Okay, but don’t tell me stories and false hope that I could be the one for you, I’m not believing anything from you anymore.

I put on my lace bodysuit totally seethrough, a pair of tight jeans and a top. I got there, he opened the door, kiss me and we talked a little. He said he saw a movie that we could watch so we went to the bed. He said “PANTS OFF!” and I was ready: the pants and top went off. We kissed, touched (but nothing happened) and watched the movie……………………………………………… NOTHING MUCH HAPPENED!! Movie ended, we stayed under the blankets to talk and I thought “he will eventually make a move!” and then he said “Aren’t you working tomorrow? It’s almost 1am, I think you should leave..

E-X-C-U-S-E  M-E?!? Are you throwing me out? Fuck that shit, I was LEVEL 10 insulted. I grabbed my jeans and my top, put on my shoes with my angry look but I said nothing.. yet! And then I realized that I owe nothing to that shit head. I have something to say, and I will say it!

With my innate passive-aggressive tone, I asked “Will we ever gonna close the deal, or if you plan on making me drive to your hotel room just to touch me and throwing me out when you’re done? I know you’re married, so are you scared to bring STDs to your wife? Is that it?”

HIS FACE!!! Man, his face.. he didn’t know what to say.. he said he wanted to talk so here we go again!

The best/worst excuse ever

So now.. he said he is rarely comfortable to go all the way to the end with a girl (but you still managed to make a baby, for fuck’s sake!) that it’s a looooong mental process to be comfortable.. and mostly, because he’s SCARED HE WON’T BE ABLE TO GET IT UP!

I instantly thought it could either be

  1. TRUE (’cause I don’t know a guy who is ready to say “he can’t get it up” as an excuse!)
  2. FALSE (like everything he said since the beginning) because he only has a fat fetish

I talked to my friends about it and after laughing our asses off, they made me realize how this guy is just a manipulator, a liar, and he thinks he is so superior to us girls because he went to Harvard and shit..

Nah.. that closed the deal for me. It’s over, I won’t lose any of my time with him anymore. Don’t call me, don’t text me.. It’s over!

Then, at CurvyCon..

Last September I was at the CurvyCon, talking and meeting new people… and at a moment, I saw a tall German girl (the one Poker Man follows on Instagram, and they talk and all – so I always thought she probably got caught in his lies too..) so I drop everything and went to see her. She doesn’t know me, but I know her. I said I follow her (true) on Instagram and wondered if we could take a picture together. She said “Of course!”

That woman is so sweet. She tells me she is in NY for the fashion week, that she plans on going to see some fashion shows and all.. and she gives me her phone so I can add my name in her Instagram to follow me.

At this instant, I see Poker Man Instagram opened and I said “Oh yeah? You know this guy? I know him too, he came to visit me in Montreal a few times..” And her face changed. Me, I was laughing hysterically inside. So she took back her phone and said “I hope we will see each other again” and went away to see her friends. I told my roommates what happened, and they laughed SO HARD..

The Grand Finale

Because my flight back to Montreal was canceled after CurvyCon, I took a later flight and I was finally able to go to the Girl With Curves launch. My roommates and I were going together and there was a lot of people there. We tried on clothes, talk to people and then I saw the tall German girl come in….. WITH POKER MAN!!

I lost it. I grabbed my roommates, I tell them and they lost their shit too. They wanted to see the jerk, the guy who lies constantly, the one who adds random fat girl on Instagram to play on their low self esteem to be able to feed his fetish the way HE likes it.. So I showed them who he was.

I walked up to him and HIS. FACE. CHANGED. INSTANTLY. The German girl saw me and looked at him, then at me, and went to see her friends at the back of the room, leaving him there. So he asked me what I was doing here.. “Well, I’m here for the launch! What are YOU doing here?” He said he was here with a friends.. Yeah, you took the plane to be at a blogger’s launch with a friend, during a plus size convention.. how convenient for someone with a fat fetish!

So I went back to my roommates. Karen took amazing pictures of them both at the event.. just’sayin!

emy needs a raincoat kissing neon

So ladies, if a cute, tall and poker player dude from the States adds you on social media, be WARNED! And if I follow you on my personnal account on Instagram, well you might already be in his target since he added most of my contacts! It doesn’t matter if you are from Quebec, Canada, USA or somewhere else on the globe, he travels a lot! Nothing stops him.

If you want more info, ask me in private. It’s gonna be my – PLEASURE – to tell you more about it..

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